Vondur

Picture of Vondur

Strišsyfirlżsing

Vondur - Strišsyfirlżsing ©1996 Necropolis
1. Kynning - Einvaldnir Er Her
2. Dreptu Allur
3. Uppruni Vonsku
4. Kynning - Fjórši Rķku
5. Fjórši Rķkins Uppgangur
6. I Eldur Og Žrumur
7. Vondur
8. Hrafnins Auga Er Sem Speglar Į Botni Af Satans Svartasalur
9. Eitt Bergmįl Ur Framtišinnar Dagar
10. Kirkjur Skola Brenna
11. Sigurskrift
12. Guš Er Dįinn
13. Ekki Krist - Opinberun I & II
14. Čg Daemi Oss Til Dauša
15. Ekki Nein Veršur Saklaus
16. Beitir Hnifar Skera Djupur
17. Höfšingi Satan

Admittedly, the most striking thing about Vondur's debut is the fact they put Darth Vader on the cover. I've always been somewhat surprised that George Lucas hasn't swooped in to sue the living daylights out of the band and Necropolis Records, particularly since this is truly one of the worst albums ever to be released in the black metal realm. With black metal already being somewhat swamped with amateurish, shoddy musicians, this is saying something.

Vondur is the, ahem, "brain" child of It and All, who appear in other lackluster outfits such as Abruptum and Ophthalamia. There is conjecture that Vondur was conceived as a bit of a joke or perhaps black metal satire, but if this indeed parody, it's poorly conceived. And if, by happenstance, these guys actually took themselves seriously during the creation of this album, we're looking a case of truly misguided sense of importance in the musical world. From the tinny production to the utterly dismal guitar sound, there is barely any instrument that that is given any sort of remotely decent recording quality. It's as though they weren't even trying. It's one thing to strive for a raw sound, but this is just laziness. The vocals of All are humorous at best and occasionally make Attila of Mayhem sound like one of the three tenors. And since the lyrics of Strišsyfirlżsing appear to be in Icelandic, it's hard to tell if they are actually singing about Darth Vader and the Dark Side. Needless to say, if Darth Vader heard this, he'd do that neat choking trick on both It and All.

In some instances, a bad album warrants a listen just to warrant a novelty listen. However, in the case of Vondur, their attempts at...um...whatever they were attempting to achieve here are so bad they would have best served by an "accidental" fire in the studio that destroyed the master tracks to this wretched affair. If there was indeed a joke behind this release, I don't think anyone is privy to the humor. You may never come across a more pathetic release in the black metal world, not even by black metal bands in Utah.

Review by John Chedsey

Review date: 01/2011

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